Not measuring up

The other day I was noticing, not for the first time, that African-American women don't appear in public without being pretty put-together. This is a trait I admire, but a habit I've failed to develop myself. This is a generalization, but for the most part,

Black women:

- have their hair styled

Emily:

- a ponytail IS a style, right?

Black women:

- have their fingernails long and manicured

Emily:

- only bites hers when watching movies. Mostly.

Black women:

- wear make-up, and often have really awesome skin underneath it.

Emily:

- makes it a goal to put on mascara on days she leaves the house.

Black women:

- wear not-insignificant amounts of jewelry

Emily:

- a couple years ago made a resolution to try to look more put-together. This involves trying to remember to wear earrings most of the time.

Black women:

- accessorize in other ways (scarves, designer purses, belts, hats, etc.)

Emily:

- see previous. Have not worn a belt since high school. A scarf is for keeping my neck warm outdoors. And of course I own a purse, or maybe it's a diaper bag. More than one would involve shuffling my stuff back and forth, and I'm too lazy for that.

Black women:

- wear clothes with labels. Today, one of my Muslim friends (a very modest woman) was jogging in her headscarf on the treadmill, and Miles read her butt aloud: "Love Pink". I told her she was corrupting my son by advertising on her rear.

Emily:

- wears workout clothes with labels. Sometimes they say Old Navy.

Black women:

- wear shoes that are an important part of their outfits (a couple ladies at my gym have gym shoes in 10 or 12 colors, to go with each outfit)

Emily:

- wears shoes that are comfortable and flat. Buys multiple pairs of the same shoe when she finds one she likes.

Hmm.

You see, when I think of accessorizing, in my mind that's something as simple as putting on a bra. After all, if I can go to the grocery store without it, then it counts as an accessory (and therefore optional) in my book. So shoes are not an accessory, but by that definition, a bra is.

Sigh. Yet another way in which I'm not the ideal cultural role model for my children...the question is, do I care enough to invest the effort into changing this rather than working to change something else about myself (perhaps something with deeper moral or spiritual significance?)

We'll see, but the exit polls are showing a slim chance at best.